Your History Leaves Much To Be Desired
As You Now, Once Again, Move Your Mighty Arm,

And Strike In The Interest Of Oil And Wealth.
Your Mission, Determined By The Fear,

From The Leg Of A Chair
He Heaved The Toothpick
As Far As The Third Tile.
The Crowd Went Mad, Banging
Their Tails On The Skirting Boards
That Surrounded The Kitchen Floor.

From The Window Ledge
(The Ten-Inch, High Diving Board)
He Prepared Himself For A Triple.
Unfortunately, He Mistimed His Jump,
And As He Hit The Greasy Water
Of Washing-Up Bowl,
He Created A Massive Splash.
The Judges Were Not Amused
And Scored Him Accordingly.