Do You Like A Cup Of Tea?
A Nice Refreshing Brew
I Find That One Is Not Enough
And Often I Need Two

When I Hear The Kettle Call
One Click The Waters Boiling
At Once I Pour It On The Leaves
Before The Brew Be Spoiling

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Let Nothing Ever Bother You
Don’t Ever Be Afraid
For Everything You See Each Day
Is Only What Man Made

Don’t Listen To The Stories
From People Who Would Scare
And Anything That Worries You
With Friends Be Sure To Share

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Could I Have Been A Copper?
My Trungeon At The Ready
To Stop The Speeding Motorist
And Tell Them Take It Steady

I’d Walk Around My Local Beat
Until My Feet Got Sore
A Cup Of Tea At The Café
Then Go And Plod Some More

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 Amazing & Funny Photos

Could I Have Been A Legal Sort?
A Solicitor With Briefs
Charging For My Sound Advice
While I Listen To Their Grief’s

I’d Help Them Buy A Property
Get Through A Tough Divorce
Do All Those Extra Bits They Want
With An Extra Charge Of Course

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Try As I Might I’ve Forgotten
Your Face A Familiar Sight
I Know I Should Really Remember
A Guess And I Won’t Get It Right

I Picture Your Face In Past Workings
A Shop Did You Sell Me Some Shoes
Were You On The Desk At The Bookies?
Taking My Bets When They Lose

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Could I Have Been A Warden?
Patrolling Yellow Lines
Looking For The Wrongly Parked
And Handing Out Big Fines

I’d Find Myself So Hated
Giving More Fines Than I Should
But I Wouldn’t Get The Tickets Out
If Their Parking Had Been Good

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Could I Have Been A Barrister?
Black Cloak And Curly Wig
With Many Piles Of Paperwork
Defending Mr. Big

I’d Call Up Any Witness
For Evidence They’re Liable
Before They Speak A Single Word
All Swear Upon The Bible

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The Much Bespangled Wozzel Duck
Jewelled Feather Every Shade
Swam The River Many A Mile
Till His Energy Did Fade

When Sun Shone Down He Sparkled
Every Jewel Lit Up A Light
All The Colours Of The Rainbow
Seen For Miles Shine Bright

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In His Splendid Isolation
Sits A Hermit Near A Cave
He Doesn’t Move A Muscle
For His Energy To Save

He Stares Into The Distance
Where He Hopes To Be Enlightened
Not All His Thoughts Will Bring Him Calm
Some Often Leave Him Frightened

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Crackers And Cheese Topped With Pickle
Black Forest Gateau With Creams
Pork Pies With Jacket Potatoes
My Trousers Now Strain At The Seams

Salads Were Left Alone Wilting
As Strange Things On Sticks Fizzled Out
Just One More Small Sherry Trifle
With More Cream If There’s Some About

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Funny Veg Jokes

A True Horror Story!
Husband Kills His Unfaithful Wife While Their 5 Year Old Son Was Still Sleeping. The Weird Thing Was That The Kid Did

Fees Maafi Ki Application
To The Principal, Delhi Public School, Sir, Baat Yeh Hui Ke Mere Dad Ne Mujhe Fees Ke Liye 2000 Rs Diye Thhe,

Hamesha Dusro Ki Madad Karo
Ek Admi Khada Apne Kaan Ko Chaabi (Key) Se Khujla Raha Tha. Santa Ne Usko Dekha, Kuch Socha Aur Uske Pass Jake Bola

True Love
A Little Boy Says To Girl "I Love U"? But She Says She Likes Someone Else, The Little Boy Looks Down In Sad Mood,

TV Ka Bachho Ke Janam Pe Asar
Santa Ki Biwi Preeto Hospital Mein Admit Thi Aur Aaj Uski Delivery Thi. Nurse Ne Bahar Aa Kar Santa Se Kaha. Nurse

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